This is what burnout feels like
How can you love your body when every magazine cover has ten diet tips for becoming your best self?
How can you lean in at work when you are already operating at 110 percent and not being recognized for it? How can you live happily and healthy when on every step the society tells you to ‘give more’, ‘you are stronger than you know’, ‘fight for yourself’ and ‘never give up’.
What do you feel?
Exhaustion, overwhelm and most importantly you feel stuck. Not knowing what will break this cycle of ‘not good enough’.
Burnout can be very exhausting to experience. It affects how we function and how we interact with other people. How we see the world and day-to-day tasks. It affects our health physically, emotionally and mentally.
Burnout officially recognised as an ‘occupational phenomenon’
International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11) defined burnout as “a syndrome conceptualised as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed. It is characterised by three dimensions:
feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion;
increased mental distance from one’s job, or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one's job; and
reduced professional efficacy.”
11 common signs of burnout
Emotional, mental and physical exhaustion
Impatience
Not feeling like yourself anymore
Feeling irritable, drained, hopeless, or helpless
Withdrawal from friends and family
Loss of interest in activities previously enjoyed
Change in mood (e.g. feel sad, down)
Change is sleep patterns
Trouble concentrating
Neglecting one’s own needs
Weakened immune system
This list is not exhaustive, but I hope to raise awareness regarding burnout.
Everyone experience stress, and it’s so easy to get stuck in the loop of ‘being busy’ and ignore the growing emptiness inside. When I’m burnt out I find it almost impossible to do things outside of work.
This is usually my red flag, the willingness to withdraw, inability to take on more and more, the ongoing neglect of my needs to the point where I do not see I have the needs.
The problem with burnout is not that we aren’t trying to prevent it, or that we don’t know how. The problem is the world has turned ‘wellness’ into another ‘should’ on the to-do list.
The problem is that nobody teaches us how to feel our feelings. And exhaustion happens when we get stuck in an emotion.
To be ‘well’ doesn’t mean to live in a state of perpetual; safety and calm, but to move fluidly from a state of adversity, risk, adventure, or excitement, back to safety and calm, and out again. Stress is not bad for you, being stuck is bad for you.
Overcoming burnout
Burnout was a gift that led me to standing up for myself.
I was irritable and unmotivated. I was stressed and I used everything I had left in me and there was absolutely nothing left when I got home. No pleasure, no excitement, nothing that used to bring me joy before, could change my mood.
After feeling like this for a while, I knew I had to make a change. I had to get out of my old job and start my own business.
I work more now than I did before. But I am fulfilled. I do things on my terms. I can take breaks when I want and see the clients I want. I can make my own balance, every day. If you’re feeling stuck and overwhelmed and like your empathy muscle decided to switch off, I hear you and I know how you feel.
I’m here when you’re ready to say no and redesign the stress response. I’ve learned to protect my energy aggressively. I know what balance means to me at work and at home, how much time I want to have for myself and how much I can give to others. I’ve learnt to say no and set boundaries.
I learned that burnout is not a failure, it is not a weakness.
We all have different levels of what we can handle, how much we can cope with.
Various situations impact us differently.
As a psychologist and health care professional, I have to protect myself from burnout. It’s my duty to bring my best self into the room with my clients. I have to be able to recognise when I’ve pushed myself too far.
And I’m here for you, if you want to learn that too.