Forget Perfectionism, It’s A Dead End Trap
The desire for perfectionism is rising.
Like a tsunami, it’s crushing through society and destroying mental health in its wake. I’m going to be blunt. You will never achieve perfection. Because it doesn’t and can’t exist.
‘Perfection’, by its definition, has to be at the cliff-edge, the very end point of your journey because you’ve done everything you set out to do and not only that, everything that it is possible to do in the very best way. You are the bastion of perfection in every sense.
Sounds like nonsense doesn’t it? That’s because it is. Who wants to get to the cliff-edge? Where do you think you’ll go next? There can’t be anything good over there!
So What’s The Alternative?
Well for a start what is wrong with being ordinary? I love a bit of ordinary, it’s healthy, and can be a lovely calm, content and friendly place to be. But I know that’s not good enough for some.
So an alternative is to shoot for excellence. Aim for depth, aim for breadth. Go deeper, go further, go beyond where your original goals stood. In other words, create a new goal and make every step to get there as outstanding as you can.
Why Excellence Beats Perfection
Striving for excellence means that there is a level of acceptance that another way could also work. And acceptance that the decisions you take are good, well thought out ones, and the best you can do at the time. You allow yourself the space to say, “this is good enough”.
Excellence gives you room for manoeuvre, for free flowing creativity versus the stifled angst of a perfectionist approach. Perfectionism is a myopic view of the diverse beauty in the world, that is bound to set you up for failure and disappointment.
We are surrounded by growth, opportunities, choices that we can make and yet the very act of always wanting to make the perfect choice can render us paralysed into indecision. What if it’s the wrong choice? What if that one is slightly better?
Indecision is the enemy of growth.
Remember this mantra: “It doesn’t have to be perfect, but it does have to be your best effort”.
The Problem With Social Media Perfection
It's no secret that social media bombards us with images of so-called perfection. But it's perfection in whose eyes? What are you measuring against? There are 7 billion people on this planet and 7 billion pairs of eyes interpret information differently - one person’s perfection is another’s, quite simply, dull.
But social media encourages self-worth validation, it heralds flawlessness, and when you perceive that you don’t qualify for this ‘impossible to achieve’ perfection, mental health disorders pay the price in the form of depression, anxiety, social paralysis, agoraphobia, eating disorders and so forth.
Steps To Achieving Excellence Over Perfection
Know what you want to achieve, setting goals is paramount, no matter how big or small
Give it your all and explore different routes along the way
If you get there, pat yourself on the back! But if your endpoint is slightly to the left, appreciate that unforeseen newness
Set up another goal, push the boundaries, and be bold, consider all the directions you could take this time
Find beauty in imperfection, enjoy the errors and be excited by originality
View the process as cyclical not linear
Perfectionism is a trap that is leading you to a dead end, that cliff-edge.
So let us forget perfectionism and celebrate uniqueness, diversity and swing on that safety rope of excellence.
I wish you all the best,
Beata